How To Build Confidence…

When we are confident, we achieve more and feel more successful says human behaviorist Dr John Demartini. He offers 10 tips on how to build confidence:

Make a plan

Clearly define what you truly would love to be, do and have in your life. Your energy soars and your confidence increases when you are clear on your aim and direction. (you can determine what your highest values are here: www.drdemartini.com/values) and structure and fill your day with high priority actions.

 Mix with inspiring people 

People who think big encourage you to expand. When you Interact with inspired people it will rub off on you, and you will become confident.

 Decide who you want to be

Rather than thinking about and dwelling on the past, start affirming who you intend to be in the future. Give yourself permission to dream big! Become present now in your future.

 Read

Reading opens your mind, expands your vocabulary and empowers your actions and results in you building your confidence. The difference between who you are today and who you will be tomorrow is directly proportional to what you learn.

I recommend reading biographies of people you admire so you can see that they also had to deal with challenges to become who they are today. When you realize that they started where you are or that they have experienced similar challenges, you realize you can do it too and your confidence will increase.

 Be grateful

Keep a gratitude diary and write down what you are grateful for each day. This will shift your perspective and actions. When you are grateful for your life you attract more opportunities and events to be grateful for which builds your confidence.

 Eat healthily

Eating too much slows you down and makes you sluggish. Eating moderately and regularly assists digestion and optimizes your health. When you feel healthy, vital and enthused, you feel confident.

 Smile

Smiling is contagious; it creates the impression of vibrancy and youthfulness. When you open up to the world, the world opens up to you. Inspired interactions with people will help you to feel more confident.

Save

Saving, investing and managing money wisely are vital to self-empowerment and confidence. Save at least 10% of your earnings every month. Saving means that you are valuing you and when you value you, the world values you too.

Don’t look back

We often drag emotional baggage around instead of looking at the loving balance and surrounding opportunities. When you see every event, whether challenging or supporting, on the way to your dreams and goals and you’ll feel more inspired and confident.

Finish it

Do what you say you will do and your confidence levels and achievement will increase.

https://drdemartini.com/blog/build-confidence/

‘Fake It Until You Make It’ – Wisdom or Folly?

If you are of the mindset that it’s wise to fake it until you make it, you might be headed in the wrong career direction. If you’ve been told that faking it is the answer to building confidence you’ll want to read on…

Authentic confidence, is a natural by-product of living in alignment with your highest values and will help propel yourself toward achievement, whereas a facade of bravado when you fake it, will always be doomed to fail.

In everyday life, an air of confidence is touted as the key to a successful job interview, audition, exam or auction bid. An outward display of self-confidence, or an over-exaggeration of confidence is often just a cover-up for its complementary opposite, a lowered self-confidence.

This incongruence will eventually be recognised, and the very facade that brings the rise will serve the fall.

Wanting to impress someone and feeling the need to adopt a facade in order to inflate or embellish your skills or experience in any area is unwise. When this area is truly one of your highest values, you will prioritise gaining skills in this area, and confidence will flow organically. When you are congruent and confident you will walk your talk, not limp your life.

No need to Fake It:

Rather than setting yourself up for failure by thinking you need to fake it, you’d be wise to determine your highest values; what is most important to you (your highest values) which will show up naturally in your behaviour. The ares of your life that are most important to you are where you have the most discipline and attention.

Perhaps you are high-achieving and confident in your career, an area aligned with your highest values,but when it comes to training at the gym, you are quite shy. Any time that you attempt to excel in an area that is not truly highest in your values, you will lower your self-esteem and confidence; you will tend to procrastinate, hesitate and frustrate doing actions that are not truly important to you.

Instead, you will become preoccupied with doing actions that are truly more important to you. You have another area in your life where you excel, and that is in the area of your greatest congruency.

The trick to authentic confidence, is to focus your energies only on goals that naturally inspire you.

When you set congruent goals, you become spontaneously inspired from within to achieve and fulfill your innermost dominant intentions. You become more disciplined, reliable and focused. Your self-worth rises, while your space and time horizons expand, he advises.

You become more objective, you plan more strategically and become more prepared for the pros and the cons and the ups and the downs, the positives and negative and the risks of pursuing and achieving your goal. In this way, you are more grounded in your expectations.

Dr. John Demartini is a human behaviour specialist, educator, author and the founder of the Demartini Institute.

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